Thursday, August 23, 2007

Burning down the supermarket

You may recall that your blogstress has a veritable herd of brothers, several of whom have appeared on this site under assumed names. Your Webwench can't possibly understand why they would wish to obscure their blood connection to your cybertrix. Be that as it may, one bold soul, Timothy C. Stan, steps into the light to discuss the phenomenon of soundtrack music for the retail environment.

The topic came up because of our common fondness for Talking Heads, and my horrified elation at finding myself serenaded, while shopping for canned goods (to have on hand in the event of an al Qaeda attack on Capitol Hill) at the local Giant Superstore, by David Byrne singing "Burning Down the House." Whatever happened to the Montivani Orchestra?

The elation was short-lived: David Byrne was next replaced by Reba McEntyre, who sang, "The Angel in Your Arms This Morning (Is Gonna Be the Devil in Someone Else's Arms Tonight)".

Tim, who has done serious career time in the retail trenches, observes:

"This hour of Retail Re-Education Radio is brought to you by Safeway, reminding you to "Conform, and drink the Kool-Aid; you'll feel better."

And by The Gap, who thinks "you're unique -- just like everyone else."

Reba, huh? Yikes. At least it wasn't Celine Dion.

Remember you're talking to someone who's endured a LOT of hours of retail music. Eventually, it either gives you super-powers or it drives you insane. That's how I got the ability to see through walls and read tree bark...

Hmmmmm. Need more Kool-Aid.
Tim asks that it be noted he is not the brother who was kept in the attic.

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